Fears and Lonely Nights
by Teddy Prior
Summary: While Cloud is running Leon is fighting. Fear is what will bring them together, fear is what will drive them apart, but what do they want? Rated M for later chapters
1. Starting Again

**Begining Notes:** Well this is my first ever story...I hope I did a good job, I'm not really super good at using this site so if I mess up don't kill me ^_^

Also un-betaed x.x I don't even know exactly how that works, but I'm very meticulous so I believe for this chapter I will be o.k.

So please enjoy.

* * *

Leon walked slowly through Radiant Gardens, surveying the expanse of concrete and metal that lay before him. People hurried from shop to shop, buying last-minute groceries before dashing off to their families to cook dinner. No sooner had the thought crossed his mind, an inaudible sigh escaped his lips. How he sometimes wondered what it would be like to have someone to come home to other than his audacious partner, Yuffie. As sincere as the young Kunochi was, Leon often found her extended presence draining and more than slightly agitating. No one should be that happy all the time. However, who was he to curse her optimism?

He went down into the lab to check on the security system and make sure that it was functioning properly before going home. He jumped when a hand was placed gently on his shoulder.

"It's alright Leon; I'm here to take over."

Leon turned to see Aerith smiling up at him serenely, her jade eyes somehow slowing the frantic pace at which his mind was going. She waved him to the door, "Go rest, I'll make sure everything's exactly the same when you come back."

Leon nodded, shoulders slanted with fatigue, "Alright, see you in the morning…"

He unlocked the door to his apartment, finding a plate of food in the microwave from Yuffie which he heat up and ate, grateful that he wasn't the only decent cook of the group. The surprising silence meant she was already asleep and it wasn't before long Leon was longing for his bed. He picked up his plate, dumping the unfinished food into the trash before setting the plate in the sink. He climbed the stairs to his room and changed slowly. Finally climbing to bed, he fell asleep wit an empty feeling in his stomach, the monotony of life wearing down on him.

***

With a furious cry, Cloud brought his blade down on yet another heartless. The battles helped him forget about his troubles, and lately they were all he thought about.

"Damn it." He sighed, deeply annoyed at his own weakness. At that moment, he looked back at the city he so cautiously avoided. How many weeks had he been away? He couldn't remember. Though the rumbling of his stomach suggested it was time to go buy more food. He sheathed his blade and closed his eyes taking slow deep breaths. What was he afraid of? Why couldn't he go back? He frowned in concentration, trying to understand his fears, but gave up shortly after feeling his memories resurfacing.

"You're a damn coward Cloud Strife." His whisper barely audible, but the words rang in his ears. Not pressing into the thought further, he made his way to his "house" which was nothing more than a run-down shack rudely shoved into a corner of the surrounding cliffs. He peeled off his sweaty - and slightly bloodstained – clothes and started the shower. The luxury of hot water was a small price to pay for the seclusion he sought.

After drying and throwing on a fresh pair, Cloud flopped down on his cot staring at the ceiling. He sighed for about the zillionth time that day and reached underneath the cot to get the few bandages he had left. He needed to restock, that was clearly apparent. With his "training" sessions becoming longer and more reckless, he would need more bandages. Finishing the last of the gauze, he folded his hands behind his head, much to his immediate discomfort, and lay back on the cot staring at the old wooden planks barely holding up. He figured he'd been out for at least 12 hours, but time wasn't tracked well and he couldn't even be sure if it was a month or two since he'd been with in the city walls. His stomach growled angrily at him, but with no food, it was ignored. He'd return tomorrow, that much had been determined.

***

Cloud awoke to the sun's rays hitting his face as they filtered through the many gaps in the shack's walls. He opened his eyes, but quickly shut them as he was instantly blinded. With a grunt he pulled himself out of been and grabbed his duffel bag. Rummaging through the clothes he finally found a decently unharmed shirt and pants; he'd need clothes too. He went into the shower to grab a drink of water before strapping his blade to his belt.

By the time Cloud finally packed everything, merely a pillow into his already packed duffel bag, the sun had risen high enough that the light illuminated the entire valley. His growling stomach forced him to move faster.

"I'm going, I'm going." He murmured leaving the shack.

"But only for a day." He told himself turning towards the city. Just looking in its direction made him uneasy. Not only for the people he was bound to run into, but also because he knew he wasn't going to get away without confrontation.

By the time he reached the center of the valley, he surmised, it was two in the afternoon. In another hour he'd be on the other side. He paused, prolonging the inevitable, to survey the area. Heartless and nobodies were scattered about in small groupings, but none seemed close enough or interested in him. The ones closest were moving in, but as Cloud began to draw his blade they suddenly turned and rushed off towards the mouth of the valley.

"Something's up." He thought aloud running after them. It wasn't until he made it to the mouth did he figure out the commotion. Not but forty feet away were Yuffie and Leon battling their way through a small group of heartless and nobodies. He smirked in amusement before walking around them, not wanting any confrontations yet.

"ALRIGHT! Another heartless gets its cumupits at the hands of Leon!" Yuffie shouted joyously over Leon's latest kill.

"Is that necessary every time?" Leon questioned parrying an incoming attack.

"Yes, it always is! You gotta let loose a little! Have some fun!" She laughed as she threw her shuriken at a heartless who popped up behind Leon.

"Oh! Look! Isn't that Cloud?" Yuffie shouted pointing.

"Heeeey! Cloooooud!!" Her ear splitting cry made Cloud roll his eyes, as if he wanted to be near that!

"Aww! He's ignoring me!" Yuffie pouted.

"Well how about focusing on the battle instead?" Leon grunted pushing off a nobody.

"Oh! I almost forgot about you!"

"Thanks."

Leon rolled his eyes as he round housed a dusk into another as it charged. Both fell into a heap which Leon proceeded to pierce with his blade.

"Brace yourself!" Yuffie shouted, barely giving time to steady himself before she hopped onto his shoulders, using the momentum to become airborne and take out some wasp-like heartless with her shuriken.

"A little more warning next time." Leon said, side-swiping a heartless, pivoting, and blocking another.

"Sorry!" Yuffie apologized, "I get caught up in the moment sometimes!"

She back flipped to get out of the way of a dusk, but a vicious tremor erupting from the ground caused her to loose balance and fall. She quickly got up and prepared to defend but the dusk was gone, as were the other attackers.

"What just happened?" She asked cautiously looking around.

"On your guard!" Leon shouted as another tremor struck revealing its source. A large hoard of heartless tore through the ground.

"What is this?" Leon asked as they began to converge to form a massive heartless.

"We got this!" Yuffie grinned running up to Leon's side.

"I'm not too sure about that." Leon corrected as they both watched the surrounding nobodies also converging, but into smaller groups, to form a sword and shield.

"Well here we go!" Yuffie shouted as she rushed the heartless, but as she drew close it side swiped her into the cliff side knocking her completely unconscious.

"No! Yuffie!" Leon shouted leaping after her and blocking the second strike on his partner.

"A little help Cloud?!"

"Well will we do for now?"

Leon looked over quickly to see Aerith and Tifa running up to them.

"Tifa you help Leon!" Aerith called out as she rushed to Yuffie's side.

"No need to tell me twice!" She shouted back putting on her gloves. She nodded to Leon and the two charged the heartless managing to force it back to give Aerith some breathing room to heal Yuffie.

"Cloud! Some assistance?!" Tifa shouted, but it wasn't necessary, the moment the heartless appeared Cloud was sprinting the vast distance between them and by the time she had called out he was already there. He wasted no time and launched himself at the heartless managing to cut into it, but not significantly damage it.

"You got a plan?" Leon questioned icily as he loaded bullets into the blade.

"Aim for the shield and sword, they must have a weak point." Tifa offered trying to stop any team fighting.

"Alright lets go!" Leon shouted firing at the shield, but the heartless suddenly raised its arm and in a flash knocked Leon and Tifa back. Cloud rolled away and prepared to strike again but realized the creatures intentions.

"Aerith! MOVE!" He shouted before leaping in front of her and Yuffie deflecting the giant sword with his own. The Heartless began pushing against Cloud pushing him back. Leon reached Aerith and the two carried Yuffie out of the way. Cloud pushed back on the blade before strafing to the side causing the heartless to stumble. Tifa and Leon rushed over preparing to fight. However, something peculiar caught Tifa's eye.

"Hey Leon look at the shield! The center is moving! I think if we aim there we can break it!"

"Get me a clean shot!" He shouted as Cloud and Tifa took off for the heartless. Cloud went straight for the offensive, slashing at the heartless only to be blocked. Tifa used this to jump onto the arm of the shield. It was swaying far too much, but she was ready.

"Ready Leon?!" She called out tensing for her strike.

"Go!" He shouted and in one quick move Tifa kicked the arm down causing the shield to dig into the ground and stick. Leon fired and struck the shield's weak point dead on causing it to burst into flames. As it did the shield exploded causing the heartless to flail wildly and sliced a deep gash into Cloud's right arm. The damage was severe and he dropped his blade. Leon rushed over to support Cloud as he fell.

"This isn't over yet!" He shouted as the heartless collided with the cliff face.

"Aerith! Heal Cloud!" Tifa shouted as the heartless slammed into the cliff face again unable to regain balance. The top started to crack and large pieces broke off careening for Leon and Cloud. Tifa fell back covering her eyes as dust was thrown up in a violent whirlwind. As it cleared she saw Leon and Cloud just out of the rubble. Leon was crouched next to Cloud as he lay in his arms.

"He's lost so much blood already." Leon motioned to Aerith and she rushed over.

"Well that doesn't look right…" She whispered.

"How bad is it?" Tifa asked.

"Looks like the muscles have been cut into and a lot of nerve damage, maybe even some tendons….We are going to need some serious healing magic if he wants to use his arm again." Leon replied.

"Imf right her ya know…" Cloud argued weakly barely able to stay awake and form a coherent sentence.

"Aerith at least stop him from loosing all his blood then we can move him somewhere safe…Leon grab Yuffie!"

Cloud watched as Leon picked him up and stared into his eyes before everything went dark.

_ Why did he look so scared?_

* * *

**End Notes:** Well there is the first! Whoa! It was quite the endeavor for my slow butt. Anyway please review! I'd love to know what you thought! Not to harsh that goes without saying, but still I ask for a generous amount of leniency. =D

Special Thanks to my friend Bri who contributed some of her amazingness into this chappy. ^_^ She is the cheese to my macaroni!


	2. The Dangers of Home

**Beginning Notes:** Second Chappy!! Woot woot! To be honest I was so surprised to have finished it so soon...Though between you and me it is because I am letting the story fall as it may so to speak. Minimal editing, and no backspace! Other wise you'd never see a new chappy x.x!!

NOW READ! Then review. =D

**Disclaimer:** (forgotten last chapter o.0 oh naughty me) I don't own Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy, Disney( not that I would want to! Disney can keep their rights!!).

* * *

Cloud awoke in an unfamiliar room practically constrained by the blankets covering him. He squirmed uncomfortably only to yelp as a searing pain shot through his arm.

"You might not want to do that. It's why the sheets are so tight." Came an annoyingly unwanted voice.

"Why are **you** in here?" Cloud questioned groggily. He really didn't expect Leon of all people to be in the room with him when he woke. The way he was reading his book and barely even acknowledging him was extremely irritating.

"It was my watch hour. Though, now you are awake you won't be wanting me here." He got up to go.

"W...wait..." What the hell was he thinking, saying something? For some unknown reason Cloud felt completely incapable of controlling his actions. Leon turned cocking an eyebrow.

"Hmm? Did you say something?"

"No...it's nothing..." Cloud responded silently wishing for death.

Leon shrugged and left Cloud in the room alone with his thoughts.

"I should have asked him..." He mumbled closing his eyes. "Then maybe he'd be the one to squirm."

* * *

The following morning Cloud woke feeling no better, but a sweet smell met his nose and almost at once he felt at ease, and all the pain seemed to drain away. He looked over at the chair in which Leon had been sitting in the previous day and was greeted by the same man's presence. Though this time he was asleep.

_"What the hell?!"_ Cloud thought unhappy to see him again. He tried to sit up again and despite the painful protest his arm gave him he managed to wriggle out of his cotton prison. He looked over at Leon again, it was no real surprise the man could find a chair comfortable, but Cloud assumed he collapsed from exhaustion. He frowned hating the fact that Leon worked himself ragged.

_"Well if he set some time for himself he wouldn't have this problem." _ Though the thought echoed his own habits. With his good hand he wrenched at the sheets prying them free. Quietly he got out of bed, blushing like mad when he realized he was only in his boxers.

"Damn, where are my clothes?" He whispered annoyed. He fumbled around, still dizzy and nauseous as he had not been recovering long enough. He bent over and checked underneath the bed, but only found dust. He stood back up, but to his misfortune too quickly, and collapsed on the floor.

"The hell?" Leon woke with a start. He looked around and not seeing Cloud quickly jumped up from his chair. Upon taking his first step he nearly tripped over the unconscious man.

"Ah damn! Cloud!" He quickly knelt beside him shaking Cloud gently. When he didn't wake Leon picked him up, with some trouble, and got him back into bed.

"Stubborn idiot." Leon mumbled sitting back down with a huff. He watched Cloud for a few minutes and once he was sure the man was still alive, he leaned back in the chair. His eyes drifted up to the flowers Aerith had brought in. The way she acquired such exotic items was baffling, for here on the table were ocean blossoms, tiare flowers, and a little lavender. The perfume they emitted was so soothing it was hard to even stay awake, and soon Leon was fast asleep.

* * *

"Cloud...Wake up." He rolled his head towards the voice and opened his eyes.

"What is it Aerith?" He grumbled, annoyed at having been woken up. He glanced out the window and was shocked to see it was mid-day.

"How long was I sleeping?"

"Two days."

"What how?" Though his question was simply answered with a smile. He eyed her suspiciously and she started to laugh.

"I guess you're blaming me? Well I didn't do much. Its really those flowers." She pointed to the table on the opposite side. He didn't bother to look.

"So can I get out of bed now?"

"Yes, you can. I think four days of being tortured is enough." Extremely grateful to hear those words wrenched off the sheets. Of course he looked over at Aerith questioningly.

"Where are my clothes?" She giggled and started for the door.

"I knew I forgot something! Come on!" He figured that she was forcing him out in minimal clothing with some devilish purpose, but reluctantly heaved himself out of the bed and followed.

"What you can't just bring them to me?"

"What? I didn't catch that."

"Like hell you didn't!"

"So grouchy!"

He soon realized that she was leading him past the dinning room and the entire gang was there. He hurried to the hall opposite, but not without receiving a few annoying cat-calls from Yuffie, a whistle from Cid, a disapproving sigh from Merlin, and...Leon...blushing?! Cloud had to double take on that one, but sure enough from behind his book, as best he tried to hide, Cloud could make out the bright red tinge on his cheeks.

"Come on! No need for a peep show!" Tifa shouted at him snapping him out of his gawking and he rushed after Aerith into the laundry room.

"There we are! Nice and clean! It was a little tough to get the stains out, but mending it wasn't at all difficult." Cloud nodded his gratitude, at least for the clean clothes, but also glared at her.

"Next time _remember_ my clothes!"

"Just trying to help!" She replied giggling away as she left him alone to change.

* * *

Leon had really not been looking forward to the day's chores, and for a reason he was soon growing to enjoy, Cloud was with him. He thought he'd have to spend the whole time playing "catch that annoying blond haired brat", but Cloud stayed with him through out the whole patrol. Which made his life easier and not having to listen to Yuffie go on for hours about nothing was a _huge_ relief. The only real downside was their proximity. Leon was still kicking himself for even showing the slightest bit of empathy for him this morning and was relieved that Cloud had either not noticed or asked about it.

"Hey..." The first word Cloud had said all day.

"Hmm?"

"...nothing..."

"_For the love o_f_ god! Would you stop doing that?!" _Leon shouted in his head. Cloud's lack of balls was seriously wearing on his nerves.

"Why do you care?" Leon stopped.

"What?"

"You heard me. Why do you care? As far as I'm concerned you barely even like me. Yet you still took watch, and carried me all the way to **your** apartment. Merlin's house was closer then yours. What is with you?"

_"Shit...well there's his balls." _Leon sighed, this was going to be tricky.

"Was this what you were going to ask?"

"Yes."

"Well...I don't hate you, and despite what you may think I care because I want to. That and the others wouldn't be happy with me if I wasn't. Aerith can be quite the beast." They both smirked at that having had first hand experiences with her silently...forceful approach at coercing people.

"As for going to my apartment, well its easier to house you in a place where there is room, or rather some one who doesn't sleep enough to care."

"Oh..." For some odd reason Cloud was expecting something different.

"Cloud... you really need to open up to us. Somethings are better shared than held."

"Says you! How 'bout you deal with your issues before preaching?!" Cloud stormed off, feeling extremely empty. He couldn't understand why he even said that, or for snapping, but now he had a reason to get away.

"God damn it!" Leon whispered.

"Try huggin' him! It makes him run faster!"

"That really cheers me up...Thanks Yuffie."

"What?! It didn't?" Her sarcasm was not anywhere close to what he wanted right now.

"Any particular reason for being here?"

"Yeah Tifa said she'd monitor the inner castle tonight so you have the rest of the night to paaarrrrttttayyyy!" Leon rolled his eyes and walked back to his apartment.

"I need a drink..." Yuffie laughed and walked after him singing the word party.

* * *

Leon grabbed the front of Cloud's shirt with both hands and slammed him against the wall. Cloud didn't try to fight it and lowered his gaze as Leon malevolently glared at him.

"What the hell is your problem." Leon's voice spoke quietly and Cloud could tell he was suppressing a lot of rage. He didn't know how it happened or why, but what did it matter now? He knew it had to happen and at least he, the coward, wouldn't have to do it.

"Just leave it Leon, I…I'm not going to stay." His voice sounded so unreal the words screaming lies in his despairing attempt at rebuilding his facade. Leon sighed loosening his grip, staring up at the ceiling. Cloud slowly brought his hands up and pulled Leon's off his shirt, holding them for a while in his own.

"You could just open up for once, no one wants to hurt you…"

"Leon, just stop now. It won't be worth it and you know it."

"I can try…or will you take that as well?" The pain in Leon's voice made Cloud want to yell in rage, he couldn't just leave he _had_ to come here.

"Leon I never said that."

"But you just want me to stop."

"No…I don't think that…I just…"

"Wanted to say good-bye, got scared and tried to sneak out. Always the runner, you'd make a great delivery boy."

"That's not it at all!" Leon was surprised at the sudden outburst but remained on the offensive.

"Well what is it then? Why did you come?"

"Just shut up its not like you care."

"You idiot we all care….What you did in the past…it doesn't matter anymore, we all love you and you can't just leave for a week come back and expect everyone to have just forgotten you. We're a family."

"**You **are...**I** am not."

"Cloud…" Leon turned away frustrated with Cloud for being so blind. He spoke softly "If you wanted to leave why did you come here?" Cloud froze; the hatred in those words stunned him. He didn't mean to hurt Leon.

"I…I don't know. Sorry." He turned towards the door, but Leon grabbed his shoulder stopping him. Cloud silently regretting coming more and more with each breath Leon took.

"Cloud that isn't an answer." The pain dripping from Leon's words was tearing away at Cloud.

"I just don't know!" He clenched his fists, throwing Leon's arm off. "I thought…maybe...but then I was watching you and…I don't know…Just forget it, just fucking forget it!"

He left with no resistance, leaving Leon baffled at what he said. He ran through the alleys avoiding the main streets full of nocturnal party goers. He wanted to be alone, he wanted seclusion, and he knew where to get it.

"What…the…hell…" Leon turned to see Yuffie on the stairs. She walked over to him placing a hand on his shoulder.

"Never thought you'd be the one to make him actually cry, yell, or run away." Leon glared at her.

"You couldn't comfort a grieving mother if your life depended on it." He tried to sound unnerved and luckily pulled it off.

"So hungry? An argument with Cloud always gets my tummy rumbling."

"No thanks."

"Well fine, but don't complain when you wither away."

* * *

***

**End Notes:** Omg! On to the next one! This is exciting! X3 (for some reason i could not get the line to appear at the end of this one...hmmm)

Random question...Who here noticed the EXTREME AMOUNT OF TALKING?! Ugh...too much! However, they needed too...oh well less talking next time. *kicking chapter for its talking* T_T I can't believe I did that!!!

Well I hope you liked it. Again review!!! ^_^

**Special Thanks:** =o What? Again?! Yes! Because NinjaSheik loved the first chappy enough to review!! =D Thank you sooo much! You pretty much spurred me to finish this one xD


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